Aspire to Expire

I aspire to give my children the best Names

aspireholic — Mon, 27 Oct 2008 15:50:47 +0000

I feel so inspired after seeing some names in the papers today….I think the parents of these people are cool, innovative, creative and definitely one of a kind…

AND I ASPIRE TO BE THEM ONE DAY

check out these names man…
Anita Bath – yes you do indeed you smelly pig…
Ben Dover – let me beat your bum bum
Will Power – to do anything you like
Justin Case – there’s always a backup
Mary Christmas – ho ho ho
Jack Cass- you said it man…
Fuk Hing Yu – f**king u…
Ida Klein – but i didn’t ask you anything…

and others include…

That’s not right…
Sum Ting Wong

Are you harboring a fugitive?…
Hu Yu Hai Ding?

See me ASAP…
Kum Hia Nao

Stupid Man…
Dum Gai

Small Horse…
Tai Ni Po Ni

Did you go to the beach?…
Wai Yu So Tan?

I bumped into a coffee table…
Ai Bang Mai Ni

I think you need a face lift…
Chin Tu Fat

It’s very dark in here…
Wai So Dim?

I thought you were on a diet…
Wai Yu Mun Ching?

This is a tow away zone…
No Pah King

Our meeting is scheduled for next week…
Wai Yu Kum Nao?

Staying out of sight…
Lei Ying Lo

He’s cleaning his automobile…
Wa Shing Ka

Your body odor is offensive…
Yu Stin Ki Pu

alongside the usual Annie Ting…Nelson Tan….Monica Cheng….

and therefore my friend
I aspire to give my child the best name that would beat all these names hands down…in a few years time when i decided to come up with a terry wrist of my own…

I aspire to be achmed

aspireholic — Fri, 24 Oct 2008 17:44:21 +0000

Why?
Let’s have some color in this block
Okay back to the topic
I think this is a pretty cool color
okay okay settle with this

1. I can fit into a suitcase and travel around the world
2. I can Kill you * you yes you know who you are W.W.W.K
3. I can bomb!
4. I can raise my eyebrow and scare people
5. I can save my voicebox as i speak in a high pitch voice *i kill you i kill you*

I’m obviously pretty bored but now this is getting very fun..oh man…

I can cook and so can you

aspireholic — Fri, 24 Oct 2008 17:43:42 +0000

Actually the title of this post should be Yan can cook and so can you

So i’m online and this is a conversation between me and one of my greatest friends

me: I shouldn’t be watching Yan can cook…It makes me hungry
She: oohh Martin Yan
She: I love him
me: ?
She: yes i love him
me: uh okay…weird but okay
She: I love him

At this part i close the chat box and when it came up again I had completely forgotten the conversation above

me: huh? what were we talkin about
she: How i Love Martin Yan
me: Oh yes that’s right..that thought just screwed the wires in my head
She: I love him
Me: okay..enuff
She: I love him
me: what the…..
She: I love him

?!? Am i talkin to a robot?

*this conversation was largely animated and exaggerated…

I’m reckless and so are you

aspireholic — Fri, 24 Oct 2008 17:42:59 +0000

If you think i’m reckless on the road, I don’t deny that…
but i prefer to see it that I see reckless as a different meaning to all….

To SOME…

Reckless = Driving fast & cutting lanes = DANGER!

To OTHERS…

Reckless = Driving fast = DANGER
or
Reckless = Cutting lanes = DANGER

To Me…

Reckless =
1. You driving on two lanes…whether knowingly or unknowingly but u’d drift out slightly making others think you want to cut into the lane but in actual fact you’re just dreaming or just tryin to be funny

2. You signal right so that you can go to a faster lane, and you do..Meanwhile I signal to the other lane as you’re tryin to cut in front of me……THEN you realise the lane that you were at previously is now faster and you hurriedly signal back to that lane again and cutting me again!!! Make up your mind dude…

3. You are at a mini road and I’m on the main road zooming in at 80km/hr approaching you soon and then you decided that your car has transformed into a bmw z3 and you decided to zoom out of the lane just as i’m coming in but your car remains the same slow car, either that or you just decided to turn and START OF AT 20KM/HR causing me to jam my break all the way to the floorboard and to find myself almost kissing your ass then you decided to go a bit faster….Bloody hell..patience is a virtue right…you see this disrupting order….

4. You are on the fastest lane of the road and you’re driving at breakneck speed man…of 30km/hr!!There’s a jam behind you and I feel so cheated that as i approach you i realise there’s a line of invisble cars in front of you! Worst, you don’t let me cut for reasons unknown……

5. You realise that your lane is going just too slow and you decided to turn into your f1 mood and change lane and overcome all these slowpokers but as you’re changing I’m actually right beside you you dumbass and you just gave me a heart attack as you attempt to imitate death race on the road while i’m happily singing my songs out loud in my car only to get a huge shock that a car is trying to ram me!

6. this is one of the worst….i probably had done it bfor but still…..okie if i’d done it i’m sorry
but for those out there who like to cut into a fast lane and then suddenly decided to break and turn into a turtle…..yeah i hope someday someone bangs you…

7. okie i take the last line back….
number 7 is dedicated to the pple who just likes to park on 2 carpark slots….amazing…what perfect eyesight…

There’s many more and as i head out today i’m sure I’ll add more to this list…so feel free to add in or feel free to defend….wah i feel so good throwing all that out in time to come i’m going to put a loudspeaker in my car and shout it out loud!

I love to laugh and so should you

aspireholic — Fri, 24 Oct 2008 17:42:01 +0000

GD MORNING USA….
I GOT A FEELING THAT IT’S GOING TO BE A WONDERFUL DAY*lalala*

So i was bored and I slept and then i dreamt of American Dad..yup the cartoon and that’s why the song’s stuck in my head….

And as i turn on the tv and await my destiny for today,
I’m welcomed with High School Musical 2…

“What time is it…party time..that’s right said it loud…..”

…………………………………………..oh shit….i’m singing the song…okie so
i admit…i kinda like the song…i can’t help it there’s someone inside there
who’s still a child and likes to sing and live in fantasy world of high school mania….

FUNNIEST THING I’VE SEEN SINCE I WOKE UP AT 530AM

So you know there’s a show called “Just for Laugh”
I think that’s a pretty cool show..now i tried to find the clip on you tube but I just can’t seem to find it so I’ll narrate out first and meanwhile put it on my list to search for the list and share….

The Scene: There’s a lucky draw at the entrance of the Supermarket
Victim: Anyone who walks in and attempts at the lucky draw
The Price: Everyone who draws win a lot of meat!!!!Beef!!!
So there’d be a poster and it says that the person won 27x beef steak, 48x beef cubes, 54 x Beef tenderloin…5 packets of mince meat etc….

so then they walk the winner to the back of the supermarket to go claim her price….

and here comes…her price from a distant….5 steps more
and she wins..

A COW!!!!

haha i think it’s really smart and really funny i mean it’s true…by winning that cow she has won that numerous number of beef steak, cubes, tenderloins, mince meat whatever hahahaha

come on..it is funny…

You see people needs to laugh more, now if i can get such pranks to be allowed in my country, I’ve more up my sleeves ha ha ha ha.

Alright, time to bathe and embrace the wonderful Friday!

I’m bored and so are you.

aspireholic — Fri, 24 Oct 2008 17:40:12 +0000

I’m bored and so are you.
Because if you weren’t bored you wouldn’t be here at all….
ah ah i know you’re going to click away and think that this is a bloody waste of time…
go ahead..i don’t care
The reason why i’m doing this….
is because I’m damn bloody bored.
And for my first entry I have no idea what I’d like to write about
except to say I’M DAMN BORED

well i could have done a few things
1) I could pour soap all over my floor and slide around in my bedroom slippers
2) I can watch senseless ET which is on right now and increase my knowledge of the Status of Jennifer Aniston and Madonna…which isn’t really that enlightening
3) I can pluck all my brother’s leg hair…or *gasp* WAX THEM..no that would wake him up
4) I could sing and imagine myself being on American Idol
5) I can start learning the dance steps to High School Musical 3 *retard*
6) I can blog

I decided to pick number 6 because I’m damn lazy…and I decided to do something i wouldn’t usually do…Thus begins the adventure of me aspiring to expire through this blog…

does that even make sense?